Self-confidence and sexual-confidence go hand-in-hand.
It’s hard to demand sexual satisfaction when you’re not confident enough as a person. People who lack self-esteem may more readily submit themselves to fulfilling a sexual partner’s desires without asking for the same in return. Conversely, a lack of confidence in your sexuality can spill over into your everyday life as well.
However, being a confident individual empowers you to demand sexual satisfaction from your partners. And understanding your sexual desires and body makes you a more confident person in general. As such, if you want to improve your self-confidence and self-esteem, a good place to start may be the bedroom.
And that’s precisely why sex toys are uniquely positioned to improve your self-esteem. There’s nothing better than a sex toy when it comes to discovering your body and sexual desires. They’re better than sexual partners (even the best and most attentive sexual partners), and they’re better than your right or left (or both!) hands!
So, let’s look at how sexual partners and our hands fall short compared to sex toys when improving self- and sexual-confidence!
You can’t be entirely liberated with a sexual partner… even the best of the lot.
Sexual partners come in various shapes, sizes, forms, and temperaments. Some are great. Some are not so great. Some support your sexual desires. And some bolster their self-image at your expense (they’re best avoided). However, even the best and most attentive sexual partners fall short when it comes to sexual discovery.
Understanding your body and sexual desires isn’t as simple as one may assume. Humans are complex beings with varied, complex, and tangled desires. It doesn’t help that our messed-up society consistently makes us challenge or question our inherent desires. Some even bury their true desires deep within, incapable of voicing them out.
Lots of us don’t even know what our true desires are.
Lots of us have trouble being 100% honest about our true desires, even with ourselves. Lots of us don’t even know what our true desires are. With that considered, being completely honest with a sexual partner (even the most attentive) can be difficult. The fear of shame, censure, or ridicule is too potent.
Of course, it’s not all bad! Our sexual partners can also help us discover parts of our body that we couldn’t access independently. They can also introduce us to techniques or methods of masturbation that we hadn’t discovered previously. Even if you find a partner with whom you can be totally honest, it still helps to understand your body on your own terms.
Our hands can do a lot… but they can’t do everything.
Masturbation is a great means of self-discovery. And our hands can certainly help us discover our bodies without fear of censure or ridicule. You can guide them to do whatever you want, let your mind wander to fantasies you may not freely express to a sexual partner, and be truly liberated in your mind.
Once you discover how you like to be touched, you can ask your partners to satisfy you better.
Learning to love yourself also empowers you to ask for more consideration from your partners. Once you discover how you like to be touched, you can ask your partners to satisfy you better. And if you’re happy getting your kicks on your own, you don’t have to depend on sexual partners if they’re not truly fulfilling your needs.
But even our hands have their limitations. They’re not always the most comfortable, and they may not reach certain places, such as the prostate, that sexual partners or sex toys can reach. And so, while going freehand certainly helps you discover your body, you can go further with sex toys.
Sex toys are the perfect means of discovering your body without fear or shame.
Now that we’ve discussed just how sexual partners and our free hands fall short let’s talk about sex toys! We’re truly in the golden age of sex toys — they’re readily available in physical and virtual stores, you have plenty to choose from, and they’re (mostly) free from social stigmas. They’re also ideally placed to help you discover your body and desires in a way that nothing or no-one else can.
Sex toys allow you to play around with your body without fear of censure, shame, or guilt. You can take your time as you explore your body, exploring hidden fantasies you can’t yet voice aloud. As you play with sex toys, you can discover erogenous zones or kinks you may not have been aware of. They guarantee sexual satisfaction and orgasms, liberating you from the need for sexual partners.
As such, sex toys generally improve your confidence and self-esteem, making you feel comfortable in your own skin.
Sex toys make you feel good. And that feeling spills into your general love and appreciation for your body. As such, sex toys generally improve your confidence and self-esteem, making you feel comfortable in your own skin. They also help you discover your g-spot or your prostate, organs meant solely for pleasure that heighten your sexual pleasure. Armed with a newfound understanding of how your body works, you can ask your partners to truly satisfy you.
Some of the new and advanced sex toys can also provide sensations that no sexual partner can. Clitoral suction vibrators, such as Biird’s Obii, generate a suction force and deliver sonic pulses into your clitoris to shake its entire structure. While most sex toys and partners can only touch the clitoral tip, Obii can activate the entire clitoral structure (the seat of pleasure), generating orgasmic sensations most people aren’t even aware of.
So, yeah, sexual partners and free-hand masturbation are great, but they don’t hold a candle to sex toys. If you’re feeling a crisis of confidence… you now know what to do.